morning

Thought holiday will be very nice but, i found out it's very boring. Can't wait to go hang out with friends, anywhere... Just don't want to sit in my room and starring at the screen. It will makes me feel frustrated, when i think about the past... Sms with Shiao Yen last night til midnight. She keep asking me about Sharon again. I'm not blaming her actually, but whenever i heard or say her name, i'll just feel frustrated. Everytime when i think back, i feel so disappoint on myself. I'm so regret for what i've done to her. From that time on, i never want to be close with anyone again. I never want to know any new friends. Even to my old friends, i have nothing to say with them. No topic, no gossip, no word. Besides, the lembaga pengawas, i just want to shut my mouth up forever. Plus the choir things, lots of things are waiting for me to do. No one can share with my feelings. Sometimes i want to tell someone about my personal stuff, but i couldn't find anyone to talk about, not even my family. All i can do is put them in my heart or write them in here. No one can understand my feelings. Well, of course i do know my friends care about me, but it doesn't mean they understand how i feel.. I would like to have her back again. But which i know it's impossible.